The NBA is Nikola Jokic’s world, and the rest of us are minions lucky to be living in it.
And that includes you, Bron.
On a 420 Day that definitely smelled like teen spirit in my cozy little corner of Ball Arena, the only pertinent question of this NBA playoff mismatch between the Nuggets and Lakers:
Does LeBron James have any legit shot of stealing more than one game in this best-of-seven series against the once and future MVP, who leads the reigning league champs?
Answer: Are you high?
The Nuggets weren’t joking around Saturday, during a dominant 114-103 victory in Game 1, although Joker did frequently toy with the once-mighty Lakers.
Is it just me, or have we seen this movie before?
Jokic arrived in the arena dressed like his doppelganger, Felonious Gru from the “Despicable Me” franchise, then treated the cast of the Lake Show like his Minions, scoring 32 points and adding 12 rebounds on a night when L.A. coach Darvin Ham seemed bent on taking away his ability to dish assists.
Just another ho-hum night at the office for the best basketball player on the planet. Here’s the thought that crossed my mind as Jokic dismantled the Lakers: Are you old enough to remember how Nolan Ryan, who struck out 5,714 batters in his major-league baseball career, threw easy cheese? Under the bright lights of the NBA playoffs, can score 32 and make it look as effortless as firing up the stove and grilling a cheese sandwich.
Maybe that’s why until I pointed out his oversight, Nuggets coach Michael Malone went nearly 10 minutes into his post-game press conference with barely a mention of Jokic.
“Who’s that?” replied Malone, having a little fun at his superstar’s run-of-the-mill but out-of-this-world ability.
I’m so old I remember when Jokic was disrespected as too unathletic to win a single MVP, let alone hoard the award.
“How many dunks did he have tonight?” Malone joked. “C’mon, man. We should be giving away free gifts …”
Now there’s an idea. On 420 Day, maybe there should’ve been buy-one, get-one coupons to your favorite dispensary every time Jokic slammed the ball home against the Lakers.
By my count, Jokic dunked what I believe to be a career-best four times in Game 1.
"We're not going to count that one," insisted Jokic, disqualifying his finish after stealing the ball from Taurean Prince as unworthy of being called a slam. "It's only three."
Denver has now beaten Los Angeles nine consecutive times, including its sweep of the Western Conference finals a year ago. Well, the vibe not only remains the same, it’s undeniable.
With a little extra juice in the step of James, who can still get out and run at age 39, the Lakers built a 12-point advantage in the second quarter.
“We’re not going anywhere. This is the playoffs,” Malone said. “You get down 12 early, you’re not going to just take your ball and go home.”
Although James and Anthony Davis combined for 59 points, the rest of the Lake Show was in over its head against Denver, which took control of Game 1 by blitzing the visitors 32-18 in the third quarter.
There’s no doubt about it. The Nuggets are clearly superior to the Lakers. And here’s the real nitty gritty: Both teams know it.
Meaning no disrespect to Luka Doncic of Dallas or Shai Gilgeous-Alexander of Oklahoma City, but the loose talk in recent weeks that seemed to suggest Jokic isn’t legendary enough to be named MVP for a third time in his career was nothing short of hilarious. And I don’t mean funny ha-ha.
But know what was a legit laugh riot? Jokic's man crush on Gru.
"I love the guy," Jokic declared.
That's why he agreed to participate in the trailer for “Despicable Me 4” that portrays Jokic in the office of a psychiatrist, as the Nuggets center works through his emotions about how he and Gru are viewed as twin brothers from different mothers.
“Why does that bother you?” asks the shrink.
“It doesn’t,” Joker replies.
Counselor: “Then why bring it up?”
Joker confesses he can find no peace, because “They won’t leave me alone.” He pulls up a shade, to reveal dozens of yellow Minions yelling adoration.
“Guys,” Jokic tells the Minions, “I’m not your boss.”
Well, I hate to break it to you, big guy.
Everybody is your minion in the NBA, where you’re the boss.
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